I wrote Married Women Who Love Women as a way to deal with my own discovery and to help other women deal with theirs. It made me think of the married men, fathers of children, who finally come out as gay — and wonder how many women secretly feel themselves to be sexually fluid too, neither fully heterosexual nor gay, butboth? Irma was my heroine it was oddly pleasing. A relative latecomer to the LGBT community, Sheila is just one of thousands of women worldwide nicknamed late-blooming lesbians -- women who declare or discover same-sex feelings in their thirties and beyond. Sex or no sex, many women prefer the company of their girlfriends to that of their partner.
In my experience, the most intense female friendships are based on laughter, shared confidences, mutual support, loyalty — and mutual admiration. Why do women turn to other women for emotional fulfillment? I know exactly who and what I am. I know four women three with grown-up children who left heterosexual relationships to live with gay partners — demonstrating that love can shift and change as you age. For author Carren Strock, the revelation came when she was The thought of someday sitting in a hospital room with her, holding her hand and watching her slide away without ever letting her or myself! Now academics are getting in on the act too. I also address issues that have never been freely discussed before: I think it will also fascinate anyone interested in female sexuality and human behavior. For many women sex within marriage is a detested chore, so is it surprising that a woman dreams of cuddles with the one person who really understands her needs: We should never underestimate the power of tenderness. What is it like for a woman who believed herself to be heterosexual to suddenly find herself enthralled with another woman? Increasingly, researchers are questioning whether adults go through a type of second puberty that can impact on their sexual preference. Many have shared their own poignant stories. Married Women Who Love Women is a look at how conflicting human desires such as change and stability, companionship and sex, commitment and passion, social acceptance and personal happiness are handled by this little-studied group. But is it possible for a heterosexual woman to suddenly wake up gay? I suppressed my feelings for 25 years. I think a lot of women, late in life, when they're no longer worried about raising the kids, and when they're looking back on their marriage and how satisfying it is, find an opportunity to take a second look at what they want and feel like. The mum-of-three left her husband after falling in love with a woman -- despite believing herself to be straight. Elizabeth Gilbert has been attacked in some quarters, not just for betraying her husband but for actual dishonesty. How many women might say: I experienced more passion, pain, isolation, and turmoil than I ever thought possible and I began to question who I really was. Nowadays, thankfully, we can be more open, more fluid. By interviewing more than women, as well as their husbands and children, and through additional research as well, I found that this phenomenon—married women loving women—was not as uncommon as I had believed. And finally, where do straight women fit in? At this month's American Psychological Association's annual convention in San Diego, a session entitled 'Sexual Fluidity and Late-Blooming Lesbians' is set to present a study of women who experienced a same-sex attraction when they were over 30 and married to a man.
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